The other day someone in a group I belong to shared a challenge to come up with a horror movie premise, you were supposed to say what kind it would be and who was starring in it. It piqued my interest, so this happened: A gang of mutated raccoons terrorizing a small mountain town – starts off slow, maybe an old guy who lives back in the hills getting killed, sheriff never solved the murder, the similar killing of a couple of hikers a few years later in the same area makes him initially think they may have a serial killer on their hands. I’d love William Dafoe as the sheriff, maybe Geena Davis as the owner of the local diner who’s resented the sheriff for years because he never solved her father’s murder. And the kind of shy zoologist from the university who knows all about raccoons and confirms that there’s something ‘different’ about these…um, Christoph Waltz, and he can also be promoted to love interest in the second half of the movie.
And then that idea decided it wanted to be more than just words in a post, so then this happened:
And now I want to write this really, really badly.
I shrank this image down to be printable on a regular sheet of 8.5 x 11 paper, btw – the original is regular movie-poster size and such an obscenely huge file that Photoshop refused to save a web-version of it. Most of the names in the credits were taken from the credits of Lake Placid, except for my fantasy-casting lead actors, myself (obviously), Chris Burgoyne, and Peter Gundry.